I’m most relieved it had an effect at all. I really am concerned it’s predictable and thus, by halfway through, pointless to read the rest.

My original idea was a poem, and I wanted to make sort of a word-web amidst the poem with four words. (I forget which words, now.)

Nice idea, but it was so far over my skill level as to be ludicrous, LOL!

Overall, your short story was very good. It certainly had an effect. I was excited to hear it came from a poem, though not surprised, given your excellent use of antimetabole and epistrophe in saying “from wall to wall, wall to ceiling, and ceiling to wall…halfway down the wall.” Lovely stuff.
Also, clever move in naming the spider but not the boy. Something not many would consciously notice (though any writer ought to, of course), but definitely works wonders.
There were some weaknesses, too, naturally. But since you obviously haven’t asked for an extended critique, I won’t make you suffer through one. XD

Also, I didn’t know you knew any other poets! Who is this “genius poet-friend”?! But really, now, I’m only beginning to learn how not-good I am, which, I believe, is the first step toward improving.

The story originally came about when I decided to challenge myself a couple of years ago to write something clean (in other words, no sex and no violence). It came out pretty good, needed minimal editing and can be found at Beat to a Pulp.

Just look for it in the archives under my real name.

Really? That’s cool! I wouldn’t have thought that right off the bat for you. That’s awesome!

Description is fun!