Natasha Fondren

Well, so, I have a piano student. He’s ten. He asked. With big brown eyes. I’m happy to teach him. The father insisted on paying, but I wasn’t going to charge them, so I quoted a figure $40 an hour cheaper than my rate, LOL. When I was ten, my neighbor taught me for free. So I figure this is just turnaround.

It was fun! I enjoyed it.

Sadly, the best thing about it was that I’m so confident about teaching. I know exactly what to do. I feel good at teaching. I don’t have that confidence or feeling of success with writing. I did before. What happened to it?

I haven’t really felt that confident this whole year. I don’t know what’s up. I’m fairly certain I made the right decision, but I think I underestimated how hard it is on the ego to change what has been your identity for thirty years.

I sort of lost my writing confidence somewhere in that.

And I miss my friends. I miss Taekwondo especially.

I can remember plenty of writing sessions where I just sat down and kicked ass. I can’t remember a single one, lately.

I’ve lost my mojo. I feel like I’ve lost myself. I don’t know.

You know, honestly, it’s not just this year. I changed a bit when I hurt my foot. It’s like my Achille’s freakin’ heel, I swear. Seriously, I can pinpoint a ton of things that changed for the worse in my life to that moment. I need it to get better and I need to get back to Taekwondo, and then everything will be better. I hope. I don’t know.

I can pivot now, so that’s a big improvement. I just can’t run and jump. I haven’t tried kicking a target yet. *sigh*

Eek, I hate when I’m moody. Glenn left for Alaska a couple weeks ago, so I think I’m feeling a little lonely.

I’m sorry it took me so long to respond to your comments last week. My computer broke, then I was getting a new one set up and all this other junk. A mess. (I always respond before my next post, at the latest. I think. LOL!) Anyways…

Have you ever lost your mojo? How’d you get it back? Where do you draw confidence from? Where do you get your identity? Have you ever… changed it? What gives you confidence in your writing? Your life?