I’m Drawing a Line,
and it’s here. I’ve had it. I’m tired of struggling to write a non-pseudonym’s genre story. I just reached a point, where… all my issues? Using them. I don’t care if some people I know draw parallels that may or may not be true.
It’s my life and my feelings, so why shouldn’t I use them?
It’s fiction, so of course I’ll fictionalize it. It’s arguable whether or not it will even be recognizable when I’m done with it, if it will be transparent.
Either way, I just. don’t. care. I need all the help I can get. Time to pull out all the stops.
Perhaps it’s the same as stuff I’ve accidentally used, over the years, and was surprised and a little freaked to see the parallels of my life in my stories. Even when you write 100% pure fiction, if you know yourself, you see little bits of yourself. And sometimes, I see threads in my writing, and I step back in horror, thinking: do I really think that?
Hey, some of my experiences sucked, so I may as well make money off those feelings. Make a silver lining. And if it connects with someone else who has those feelings, all the better.
Over the last nine or so years, my writing progress has mostly been a deeper and deeper exploration into who I am and how I feel. There’s mechanics and methods and techniques and skills, but in the end, it always comes down to me going deeper.
And I refuse to give up on writing a non-pseudonym story. It’s just going to happen. Period.
This seems to be my mental hurdle, as I’ve been struggling with it for years. And frankly, I am just sick of it. (I can’t imagine how you guys must feel, although to be honest, I’m having a moment of wow, you guys rock, I can’t believe you still read my blog!)
So what has your writing journey been like? What has your greatest mental hurdle been? How’d you get past it?
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Natasha Fondren is a writer traveling the U.S. in a camper with her four cats and husband. She spends summers camped near her niece, because, well, her niece is her favorite girl on the planet.
I’ve always very much enjoyed inserting pieces of myself and about me into the characters I write. I tend to intensely identify with characters, especially my own, and my writing started out very much as an element of daydreaming myself into adventures.
Me too, Charles. Exactly. I spent twenty-five years daydreaming (and thinking myself a little crazy) before I started writing them down.
I always stick in various parts of myself into characters, to the point where people say, “I remember when that happened to you!”. This makes it awkward if there is a nasty mother, or mean husband, because people assume these are representations of my family. It’s especially bad if it’s my mom, because she’s very sensitive. Adam isn’t. He thinks it’s funny.
LOLOL! It must be fun to live in your house. You guys sure laugh a lot!
There’s a lot of me in my fiction; I just skipped parts.
I think my heroines are a lot like me. Only taller, thinner and younger. A few are richer too. And I don’t think any of them has cleaned toilets in the pages of the book, or washed loads of clothes.
Can you tell that my dryer is buzzing as I type? No wonder I love my fantasy land.
Though their characters may include pieces of me, their circumstances are different. But I know what it’s like to be happy, sad, grieving, in love, brokenhearted… All the emotions. When I write, I use all of that.
LOL, Edie! Mine are braver, more energetic, and have happier endings. *grins*
I finally did laundry last night. After a month. I was wearing rags, LOL.
I don’t know who said “Write what you know” but they hit it on the head. Sometimes, if you haven’t experienced something first hand, you can’t write it no matter how much background research or whatever you do.
Your experience is what makes your writing say what it says and do what it does. So let it flow, girl.
Elizabeth, that’s true. I usually use the real stuff, but I guess I’ve not used a portion of myself. I think it’s time.
One of the first books about writing I ever bought, way back in the Cretaceous Era, was Just Open a Vein by William Brohaugh. It was an all-around advice book, IIRC, with the usual sections on formatting and submitting and plot and characterization and whatever all else, but his basic philosophy was summed up by the title — Writing fiction is easy, you just open a vein. IOW, the whole point is to put something of yourself into your work. Not necessarily making it autobiographical in any recognizable way, but some of you should be there.
I don’t know that I always do that. Although on the other hand I don’t know that I could not do that even if I tried. But yeah, there are times when I specifically recognize those little drops of blood down there on the page. And that’s okay.
Angie
I haven’t read that one. I’m going to have to check that out, Angie!
I hear you about the blood, LOL…
I think most writers insert a little bit of themselves in what they write. I know I do … whether consciously or subconsciously. But you gotta make it believeable – warts and all.
Liz, I always do, but this feels really obvious. But I guess it will only be obvious to about… three people. And I’ve just gotten to the point where I don’t care.
And thank you for still reading my blog… when I remember to post.
Of course I read your blog, Heather!
Who says I’m past my mental hurdle?
Laura, yeah. It’s like an eternal, never-ending quest.
I’m a bit careful when it comes to using the world around me. Even though I’m using my home base quite extensively in my various writings, I’m now making sure that I use composites when I’m describing certain characters in my stories.
As for my writing journey, it goes off on various tangents of random WWIT (what was I thinking) for short periods of time, before I can get it back under control.
An example of WWIT is that for winter ‘09/spring ‘10, I’ve entered about 13 writing contests.
The mental hurdles are still there, it just takes me a while in order to find just exact spot to launch myself up and over the hurdles.
I like that thought, Georgie. Finding the exact spot to launch.
ROFL… WWYT?! Good lord! I’ve entered two in my life.
The biggest leap I’ve made is stepping outside my comfort zone. And that means tapping into some ugly shit. I say go there and make money off it.
They say writers only have 6-7 themes anyway.
Sounds good to me, Betsy! I think you’re right. And I’ve been avoiding this theme. I’ve overused the others…
One of my hurdles is the fear rhat readers might think some aspects/attitudes/experiences are about me when they are not.
Bernita, for some odd reason, I’ve never feared that. I fear being accused of “getting it wrong,” mostly.
I have me the enemy and he is me. As I think you know. Go with the Nike slogan: just do it.
Me too, Mark. Me, too. (Well, I mean my enemy is me.
)
Am doing it.
I don’t have a problem being honest in my fiction. So far I haven’t used specific events that I’ve experienced — I just stick with thoughts and emotions, most of which I think could apply to a lot of people. If someone wants to accuse me of something I’ll just fall back on the “it’s fiction” line.
I’m always honest; I just realized there’s a very big portion of my psyche that I haven’t utilized. I guess it’s time.
What I worry, a little, is that someone might be hurt by what’s in my psyche, if they happen to recognize its roots. But really, they deserve it if it does.
I’m probably not as transparent as I think, though. Or maybe I am.